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Why Are Us Indian Guys So Creepy?

IndiancricketersI, Sanjay, have been a creepy Indian guy. However, after staying in the West and travelling around, I have come to realize some of the reasons why us Indian guys come across as creepy to the Western world. I would like to give you some of the background of where this is coming from. My hope is that in doing this, I might help you understand the local culture more and better interact with it so you can have a better experience while in India.

1. India is a very conservative society. Males and females are segregated from each other starting from school and there is very little social interaction between them. We are used to a world where men and women don’t talk to each other unless they need to or they are interested in each other. Even then, smiling doesn’t occur. When a Western women in this society chats up a local guy and smiles while admiring the local culture, the local sometimes takes it as a sign of interest. This gives him the dream of a beautiful white wife and life in a foreign, rich country where he can fulfill his dreams and make his family wealthy. The feeling of love comes to his head, and he is ready to do anything to achieve this dream.

2. Because of the limited social interactions with women, we are not used to flirting much and we flirt the way an inexperienced thirteen-year-old boy might do it in Western culture. Also the social barriers change the way we flirt. During my high school years, I never had the courage to go straight up to a girl and talk to her for fear of getting beaten up by her father or brothers. Instead, I would follow the girl back home (stalk) in a way that she notices for 8-10 days. Then I would dissapear for 3-4 days and follow her again. If she smiles upon seeing me, that would be an invitation to talk and then I would talk to her at a place where no one sees us or drop her a letter. By Western standards, this is no doubt creepy and can(most probably) lead to a restraining order.

matador-pua3. Locals think Western women are easy. Indian society is very conservative when it comes to sex before marriage. I can say this with certainty based on my own experiences with Indian girlfriends. In one case, I was in a relationship of 4 years without any sex. By compairson, Indians, who get most of their knowlege about the West from Hollywood or from hearing stories of their friends living in the West, come to view Western society as being much more open inregards to sex. Without knowing the social dynamics of the West, many Indian men come to believe that Western societies do not value sex very much or give it much meaning, which all goes towards making Indian men believe it is much more common and regular occurrence. This belief that sex is easily had when combined with the average Indian man’s lack of knowledge about how to flirt or even talk to women can easily cause us to come across as quite weird when we try :).

All that said, a lot of us are really good/helping human beings in this country, and it’s good to be nice to locals and smile/mix with them to learn local culture. Calling an Indian Brother/Bhaiya/Paaji would send him the right signal that you are not interested in him and would help keep the people with wrong intentions away.

Sanjay Sodhi
The Founder of Jugaadus, Sanjay came back to his hometown Amritsar in Feb 2014. He has proven all the stereotypes of being Indian right by studying engineering, Working in an IT company in India (Bangalore) for two years and then a year and half in the Netherlands. After quitting the job, travelling the world for a year with hitchhiking , couchsurfing and introduction to spirituality in India, Sanjay is trying to show tourists the punjabi hospitality and culture. He lives out of the Jugaadus’ eco hostel and is trying to make it a home for the travellers coming to the city. He loves making weird faces, talking about cultural differences, making jokes to challenge normality.

9 thoughts on “Why Are Us Indian Guys So Creepy?

  1. Thanks for writing this. It gave me a lot of information about Indian culture that I didn’t know, especially in regards to how the courtship process works. It’s easy to see how the way it works there could translate into a restraining order here. haha

    And correct me if I’m wrong, but people tend to not take no for an answer the first second or even third time. I felt like that had a lot to do with the problems I heard women talking about while there.

  2. nice point Brian!! NO doesn’t work because we speak different languages culturally even if we are both speaking english. An indian girl asked for sex would create a scene till the guy is beaten up, if she doesn’t she might be interested and saying no for cultural inhibitions. I grew up in a small town of India and would say our modern cities have more modern culture but still a lot of people are coming from small cities to these big cities so a mix of these cultures is what you would see

    1. Bhaiya aap kyon western logon ki nazar mey hum hindustaniyo ko gira rahe ho? You have made a gross generalization about how Indian men think and behave! Just because there are a few stray cases of sexual crime or harassment against foreigners by Indian men in a country of 1.2 billion does not necessarily mean that all Indian men are sexually starved potential criminals. The truth is that sexual crime and harassment is a reality of every society. You think there is a shortage of repressed perverts in America? Creepy behavior is not specific to Indian Men. Stop generalizing and stop feeding the superiority complex of the West.

  3. You must learn to take a crap indoors instead of outside on the street. That would go a long way towards helping eliminate the creepiness of indians.

  4. I hate indian men. I of south asian origin but was born and live in europe. Whenever I travel to a country with an indian poplulation such as malaysia, singapore or just in transit at dubai or abu dhabi airports its always indian men that give you this unerving stare like they are mentally raping you. Im sick of it, i am wearing jeans and a blouse why are they staring? I stare back at them for 30 seconds and they dont stop staring. They can walk down the street not looking at front but at side staring at you and not manage to die crossing the road. I really wish they would die! I have been stared at for 30 minutes straight while at a restaurant, the mans wife and 5 year old daughter were next to him. He did not talk to his wife for 30 minutes but ate his food whilst staring at me! How can any wife tolerate this? Women like that are part of the problem. I would want to vomit if my husband did something like that and right in front of me! I give them dirty looks or say what you looking at which falls on deaf ears and they continue to stare! Its so disrespectful and dehumanising. I was almost groped on a plane by indian man too so had to remain vigilant on flight and couldnt snooze like everyone else for fear of being molested. I wish indian men would go back to india and not venture into the world, they are so disgusting with their rapey stares. They really bring an area they populate go down. I never visit little india in any country because there will be these perverts there. India needs to educate its men to be more respectful, no other country man behaves like this. They are like sex pest zombies. I will never go to the country India because of these bastards. I mean as a country you are known to have a rape capital. Isnt your government ashamed of this title? I really wish the rest of the world would put sanctions on india until their goverment and society learned how to treat women with respect. And there should be a work and travel ban on indian men because they harass women wherever they go. There also needs to be better feminist movement in india, all of those women need to stand up for themselves and tell those bastards you cant treat us like this. India would be better off if the male population significantly declined.

  5. Oh gosh…I totally googled why Indian men are creepy and got this. I was being friendly to the person sitting next to me on the plane from India to China. He asked me what I was doing in India so I told him I was there with my husband just on vacation but headed to China on my own. He asked for my social media contact and I explained to him that I was married but gave it to him anyway as I like to have many platonic friends. 2 years later he tells me he is visiting my city and wants to stay with me. Saying that he knows my husband is away…….. soooo creepyyyyyy. I never invited him over and don’t remember mentioning my husband being out, and he said “I’m coming tonight to spend time with you and stay with you. Where are you?” He asked for my address and then I now block him. Did I send wrong signals??

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